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Commiserations on your loss, Graham, it's never easy. Growing up, we never had cats, but after my parents passed away I was left with our family dog, Whisky, a Jack Russell. In those days, in Mallaig you didn't "walk" the dog, you just let it go out to wander as he (or she) pleased and just waited for their return. One evening Whisky had to drag himself back to my door. Something badly wrong; phoned the vet, (Fort William-based) who agreed to meet me in Lochailort to examine the dog. Vet diagnosed a tumour, the dog would have to be put down, and would I hold Whisky for him while he did the necessary? Just as the needle went in to his fore-paw, Whisky turned his head towards me, looked me directly in the eye and then slumped to his oblivion. I'll never forget it, or the tears I shed on my journey home. That was when I vowed : I'm never gonna put myself through this again...
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Posted: |
Nov 24, 2022 - 11:36 AM
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By: |
Tall Guy
(Member)
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Commiserations on your loss, Graham, it's never easy. Growing up, we never had cats, but after my parents passed away I was left with our family dog, Whisky, a Jack Russell. In those days, in Mallaig you didn't "walk" the dog, you just let it go out to wander as he (or she) pleased and just waited for their return. One evening Whisky had to drag himself back to my door. Something badly wrong; phoned the vet, (Fort William-based) who agreed to meet me in Lochailort to examine the dog. Vet diagnosed a tumour, the dog would have to be put down, and would I hold Whisky for him while he did the necessary? Just as the needle went in to his fore-paw, Whisky turned his head towards me, looked me directly in the eye and then slumped to his oblivion. I'll never forget it, or the tears I shed on my journey home. That was when I vowed : I'm never gonna put myself through this again...
Which is exactly why nobody should never leave their pet alone with the vet to be put to sleep. Vets I’ve spoken to say the hardest part of their job is euthanising animals that look in vain for their humans in their last moments. “I couldn’t bear to watch” is a shameful thing to say once you realise its significance.
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It's strange the little details that send us unexpectedly into floods of tears - on Friday night we were seemingly fine, out with the extended family having a few wines, then I got home, opened the fridge, and saw the packet of his favourite sausages, opened. He had eaten two that very morning. There were three left. And the rest of his tin of "Recovery" food for very old cats. Chucking it into the bin was one of those very tough moments. Just little details.
I was very moved by your post, Graham. I still remember our family dog who lived a long life and eventually had to be euthanized. That was 32 years ago, and I've lost my mother and sister since then, but even so, you never forget your little friend. She was the only pet I ever had.
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Posted: |
Nov 25, 2022 - 5:49 AM
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By: |
MikeP
(Member)
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Graham, I'm so sorry to read this, so sorry you've lost Oscar. I'm a die-hard Cat person, and losing any beloved pet is hard, but cats...cats, usually you have to "earn' their love  But once that cat chooses you, once they bond with you and you KNOW you're Mom or Dad, yeah that's in a special class of it's own.
Over the last 30 years we've lost 2 long term feline housemates. Both passed of common ailments with older cats. In the case of Spooky, a gorgeous fluffy Rag Doll, he fought a long battle with UTI ( ended up having his urinary tract re-routed to more of a females ) and liver failure. At one point the vet told us there was nothing more he could do, and we brought him home to be comfy with mommy and Daddy...and he pulled through. We took him back to the vet after a few months and were told "I've never seen a cat make recovery like this, maybe you guys loved him back to life". But eventually all things caught up with him, we saw his condition decline, and one more I woke up for work and found him in the hallway, already crossed over the Rainbow Bridge.
Before Spook, a jet back short hair, Little Puss was our joy. His UTI took him, and being with him as the vet put him to sleep was crushing - damn it's been 20 years and I'm misty eyed now - but we loved him to the end. I'm sure Oscar knew it too.
We have two cats now, Penny & Scooter are our furbabies, we can't do without having those little lives in our home. As you said, we do celebrate the time we had with our kitties, but that twinge of sadness is there.
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Graham, I'm not on Facebook and don't come to the non-score side here regularly, so I have seen this thread only now. I'm deeply sorry, as a now-veteran cat convert who has had to endure this parting several times now myself. At this point I especially grieve for cats; whether my own, or even to know of others who still were loved by anyone else.
Recently I wrote a note here for Dogbelle (https://www.filmscoremonthly.com/board/posts.cfm?threadID=149615&forumID=7&archive=0) for a recent loss of his dog. However, for you now I'll add more advice.
As your loss is shared among your family, Graham, I recommend that you collectively talk about your cat. Get together when you'll be neither distracted nor interrupted, and share stories about him -- especially what will make you laugh. Dredge up and swap recalled incidents that feature Oscar's most-recognized habits and behaviors that demonstrated who he was. Best of all, you and your wife and son should relate memories that have not been discussed lately or perhaps were never shared with the others at all... but there will be value in laughing over your memories now.
The sooner you can link thoughts of Oscar to humor and remembered joy, the sooner you'll stop trying to avoid thinking about him at all (expecting to renew only pain).
I share your loss right now (as I so well remember the end of my time with each cat I have lost since 2005). I do hope the "humor therapy" that has helped me so well can serve your family, too.
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Posted: |
Nov 29, 2022 - 3:51 AM
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By: |
Graham Watt
(Member)
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Just revisiting this thread to thank the latest contributors (Mike, Steven, Ed Wood's mom) for your heartfelt condolences, personal reminiscences, and advice (in the case of Steven).
Lovely words from all. Very busy at the moment at work, which in some ways is a blessing. Seeya all soon (I have a few ideas to add to threads on da udder side, but they'll have to wait).
What's that yamming I'm hearing from outwith my "workstation"? Oh, it's our only remaining cat, Nikki. Eight years old. She'll be missing her old pal. Anyway, thanks and byeeeeee for now.
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