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Posted: |
Feb 14, 2015 - 12:08 PM
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By: |
Graham Watt
(Member)
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FOUR FUCKING YEARS LATER.... And now I'm going to give you a slap around the head. Forget about a relationship. I'm going to say that again, because it's terribly important: FORGET ABOUT A RELATIONSHIP. In other words, ignore everyone's helpful and well-meaning advice above. (sorry, but it's clearly not working) Fill up your time with other things, and stop moping. Go and find some volunteering work in your area, a hospital or something like that. Get involved in helping your local community and do some good, while at the same time (and this is the clever bit) you're maximising the chances of a relationship popping up out of the blue. But if the main aim isn't to find one, the pressure will be off in the meantime. As long as you're feeling sorry for yourself and not doing anything about it, I doubt that anything'll happen, and those around you may start to find it a bit boring, thus perpetuating the issue. I may not everyone's cup of tea around here, but I think that this is good advice and it comes from a little hidden part of me that still retains some compassion for my fellow man. God knows I've tried to suppress it. TG that was more than two years ago, mr jack... i see you had no luck even following the good advice... yes, a difficult case - let me ponder it...
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Posted: |
Feb 14, 2015 - 1:33 PM
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By: |
Graham Watt
(Member)
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I hate my life. Couldn't even get laid by PAYING for it. Sure you could. Tried in 2013...nothing worked. when at first you don't succeed, try try and try again... 2015 may be your lucky year, mr jack. tell you the truth son, i paid for a zillion no-good whores back in 2013 - i thought i was the dude, all swagger and cowboy boots... i musta spent a billion dollars gettin' my rocks off... but y'know, lookin' back, it was all just kinda meaningless... i saw one of them no-good whores again just last week... she didn't recognize me - and then it dawned... this ain't love, this ain't a relationship, this ain't even friendship, this is just nothin'... and i'd spent a billion bucks on that daughter-of-a-gun. so i just went back to wankin' m'self off in front of t'telly whenever benny hill was on.
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Posted: |
Feb 14, 2015 - 3:45 PM
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By: |
edwzoomom
(Member)
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I still live at home with my mother, I don't own a car, I'm painfully plain-looking, I make less than $250 a week, and I go into spasms of barely-concealed terror around attractive women. Yeah, what a catch! My dear Mr. Jack, this woman, wife, mom and former dater of men who lived at home/didn't have cars/were plain looking/were painfully shy/made less than $250.00 a week/wore polyester - wants to tell you something. There are plenty of women out there who want a humble, shy guy who wants a loving relationship with a humble, shy girl.. Yes, there are bimbos and divas aplenty who won't give you the time of day. Those are not the type of women you want or need anyway. Let them chase after the serial daters who smell too good, look too good and never remember your name or number by the end of the week. I dated this type too. When I brought this type home, my mom always told me I wasn't going to end up with this type of guy, not because I wasn't what they wanted but because they weren't what I wanted. She said "honey, you are going to end up with someone who sweeps you off your feet with his honesty and simple desire to love you and be your best friend". These are not her exact words but so very close. Guess what? She was 100% right. She passed away in 1985 and I met him in 1986. I married him in 1987 and it is 28 years today. He is my best friend and the love of my life. He didn't live at home but he had some of the ugliest, second hand furniture I had ever seen. He was shy but had a great smile and still does. We were both in our early 30's and had dated lots of toads and trash between the two of us. The worst thing? His wardrobe! He actually wore polyester pants! It was not love at first sight. No, it slowly grew into a comfortable friendship that grew further into a loving relationship. I can actually remember the exact day I fell "in love" with him. My advice to you Mr. Jack is to stop being so hard on yourself. Do not sit back and tell yourself that you are unable to find someone. Tell yourself what you DO have and that will come through in your attitude. There are always things you can do to pretty up the package ( a new hair style, a new outfit) that doesn't cost much. Go to places that represent your hobbies - record stores, video game stores etc. Take a class that requires you to speak in front of others. I actually took a public speaking class years ago to overcome my shyness. Do something though. Don't sit at home and dream. Do! I wish you the very best and hope you have happy news for us some day soon.
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Posted: |
Feb 15, 2015 - 7:36 AM
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By: |
Jim Phelps
(Member)
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FOUR FUCKING YEARS LATER.... And now I'm going to give you a slap around the head. Forget about a relationship. I'm going to say that again, because it's terribly important: FORGET ABOUT A RELATIONSHIP. In other words, ignore everyone's helpful and well-meaning advice above. (sorry, but it's clearly not working) Fill up your time with other things, and stop moping. Go and find some volunteering work in your area, a hospital or something like that. Get involved in helping your local community and do some good, while at the same time (and this is the clever bit) you're maximising the chances of a relationship popping up out of the blue. But if the main aim isn't to find one, the pressure will be off in the meantime. As long as you're feeling sorry for yourself and not doing anything about it, I doubt that anything'll happen, and those around you may start to find it a bit boring, thus perpetuating the issue. I may not everyone's cup of tea around here, but I think that this is good advice and it comes from a little hidden part of me that still retains some compassion for my fellow man. God knows I've tried to suppress it. TG This bears bumping. If I were the recipient of those words of obvious wisdom, I would feel the sting of their truth. P.S. You're not my cup of tea either, TG
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Posted: |
Feb 15, 2015 - 10:42 AM
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By: |
Graham Watt
(Member)
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jim, you bumped my bump. i think it's interesting that mr jack hasn't directly responded to any of the advice given over the past six years... it's obvious that he has a sense of humour, because i've just spied on some of his other posts... mr jack - i wonder if you are perhaps having us all on, and laughing at us all while lying naked on a bed surrounded by lots of adoring totty.... but in case you aren't, let me adopt the agony aunt persona once more and quote something i read a while back... can't remember who it was, but it's basically - you'll make more real friends in five minutes by showing real interest in other people than you will in a lifetime trying to make other people interested in you. oh, and if you do neither, well you've got no chance. tell us you're having us on, mr jack, because if your story is true then it's rather sad... and i feel like being silly.
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